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The key to a Happy Muslim Marriage

Actions are only judged by intentions; each person shall be rewarded only for that which he intended (Bukhari).

All human beings share the same basic needs to feel needed to be appreciated, respected and loved. And the most obvious thing about these needs is that they all depend absolutely on the relationship of one person with another.

There are really two keys to a happy marriage. The first is to love Allah and to seek to apply His principles in every situation and relationship. The second is to do a little sensible soul-search and analysis before taking any commitment and is going to affect the lives and wellbeing of so many people and not just your own. Before committing themselves to a life partner every individual should try to sit down calmly an become conscious of what their needs really are and consider whether or not the proposed partner is going to prove likely to be able to fulfil those needs. You have to know yourself pretty well and also have a fair idea of whether or not your intended spouse understands them and is willing to share it.

If your marriage is to be successful you must also be considerate towards the legitimate needs of your partner and not just look to your own gratification. If you are going to be happy then your spouse must be happy also or your relationship will not stand. We have the spiritual need for inner peace and contentment. We need to feel at home with a partner whose way of life is compatible with our own sense of morality and our desire to live in such a way as is pleasing to God.

To make a successful marriage it is also vital that you take into consideration the needs and nature of your partner. What he or she believes about life and everything is important in the pursuit of your own happiness and success. For if only one half of the partnership is happy and fulfilled by the relationship it will not be long before both are affected.

It is important for life partners to have a shared attitude to their religion. Allah has prohibited marriage to polytheists and has commanded us to marry people of religion. He has also approved the involvement of parents and guardians in the choice of spouse.

Family backgrounds often have a great deal to do with the set of values people have. When the background of both husband and wife are similar they will probably find it easier to grow together. However Allah and Prophet have stated that people from widely different backgrounds can make very good marriages so long their attitude to their religion is compatible.

'A slave who believes is better (for you) than an idolatress though she attract you.' (Quran)

'A woman is married for four reasons for her property, her rank, her beauty and her religion. Win the one who is religious and you will prosper (Bukhari)'.